Being something is never a 'sin', only behaving a certain way can be a 'sin' surely?
Can you sin by what you think of, or just what you do?
Well I guess the 'Thou shalt not covet.. ' commandment refers to a sin of pure thought,
but it's a long way from 'Thou shalt not kill / steal / commit adultery', those being sins of behaviour etc.
I suppose thoughts that are purely in your head that you don't verbalise in front of other people are one thing, but you can't get away with just saying things that you don't actually do, and then claiming it's all fine because you didn't actually do them.
But then again, no one sane thinks its actually a 'sin' to shoot people and steal stuff inside Grand Theft Auto, so long as you didn't pirate your copy of Grand Theft Auto, and a lot of people don't really care about that so much, as long as you didn't commit Grand Theft Auto in real life you are pretty safe from actual prosecution.
Thou shalt not whack one off while thinking of how nice it would be if thou didn't have the parts to whack one off like that?
Thou shalt not seek to understand thy biological makeup in much more fine-grained detail?
Thou shalt not behave so much like animals with all their various variations of behaviour which are often clearly mal-adaptive to their actual bodies? http://transsexual.org/anec1.html
For me the biggest sticking point for a long time was probably 'Honour thy father and thy mother..' which kind of stands in the way of doing a lot of what you want if you even think they might potentially disapprove of it, or it might bring indirect social 'dishonour' on them, which covers a hell of a lot of bases, in all areas of your life, particularly if what you really want is to have your most sensitive bits turned inside out, which a lot of parents are probably strongly against.
But I think that's a bit ridiculous too, since society generates so so many pointless rules that it's practically impossible to remember them all, do you also dishonour your parents if you talk with your mouth full, ever put your elbows on the table, don't wash you hair for a month, wear white after labor day, etc. etc. even if they never find out about it, because you are not living up to all the various social 'values' that they once tried to impart to you? You should always do what they say because of the dreaded, "I didn't bring you up to behave like that.. " kind of thing, which probably covers a hell of a lot of so-called face-saving but in actual fact rather dysfunctional behaviours.
What if you happen to think that your parents are rather stuffy and 'fake' social climbers like Hyacinth Bucket, they are clearly overcompensating for something themselves, and you personally can't actually afford to maintain that kind of a lifestyle without making someone else suffer for it, even if you wanted to? Their tastes may seem rather superficial to you, but does that mean that yours have to be too?
Take this one..
Do you not think that plenty of parents would actually be pleased that their son was considered attractive enough to be able to date a lingerie model? Isn't that actually a sign that you've done a really good job, and not a potential source of family dishonour?
What if she's considered (one of) the most beautiful woman in the world? Is it still a dishonour?
There is a big gap between being a lingerie model and being a porn star you know, and even that doesn't break 'Thou shalt not kill or steal' and may or may not break 'Thou shalt not commit adultery' depending on your circumstances. Chances are if you get to date a famous super model then a lot of other people will be involuntarily breaking 'Thou shalt not covet' whenever they see you arm-in-arm, which might actually be something you enjoy.
Eventually my dad died, so unless you still have to honour what you imagine your Father's wishes were long after they are not around, I think I'm fairly safe on that one, and well, I just got so fed up that I explained everything in fairly great detail to my mum and kinda said, 'This is how it's going to be, I will never be getting anyone pregnant, and I will always want to be the one that gets fucked rather than the one that does the fucking, and I really want to do this thing, even if it takes till I'm 40', and so now it's done.
So I'm not sure if that's honouring her wishes exactly, but it's not like I just let her catch me in bed with someone, I was pretty careful for a long time, and only after a great deal of thought, and having waited for nearly 20 years post-puberty, I like to think I tried to break it to her fairly gently. ;-)
Perhaps the needs of the community as a whole outway the needs of the one to maintain their sense of 'status', which when you think of it, is really just an idea in their head, and not an actual measurable 'thing', unless you count it by the contents of their bank account or perhaps their social reputation if they are really aiming for posthumous canonization.
Since lots of people seem to keep on arguing whether even Mother Teresa was actually as 'good' in all areas of her life as her public profile would suggest, it looks like you can't actually always win that one either.