Jul 6 16 12:16 PM

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I've been seeing threads about people on here questioning their sexuality or talking about attraction to men and faceless men or changes in attraction after transition etc. I thought I would share my real practical experience as a transgender woman who had mostly dated women before and then gave men a try after going on HRT. Prior to transition I'd been attracted to masculine athletic women and sometimes masculine qualities in women. 

I relate to many on here with the feelings of want to be her and do her etc.. but I started getting attention from men when going out to clubs. When these men treated me like a lady and gave me a lof of feminine feelings, I pursued things further with them. Of course these were tranny chaser men only after sex, but hey I wanted to experiment myself.When getting alone with them I discovered things I liked about men I never thought of before. I liked the way their hard penises felt warm, I enjoyed giving them oral sex. I liked when they carassed their penises on my body.  I liked receiving nipple play. A few of them I even enjoyed kissing. I liked the one's that were in shape with a toned body. It was a good experience overall, however some of these guys were complete assholes who only treated me like a sex object after and I pushed them away.

 So I took the practical approach with things. Much of the theories and fiction stories people write or read makes things more and more confusing. There are certain things that stories and reading research pappers can't give you. 

Am I still attracted to women and open to dating women ?  YES. 
Would I date a man in the future ? YES I would date a man if he wants more than just one time sex.

 Overall the experiences with men were well worth it,  Part of what I enjoyed was being treated as the lady in the encouter and being the female in the male female dynamic.I also learned that I can like certain male body parts. I will elaborate more on some of the encounters on this thread if people are interested. I also had an experience with transgender women I can write about.      
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#1 [url]

Jul 6 16 1:22 PM

Thank you for giving us your insight!

I have to admit, that I am fascinated by how transition can change orientations in SOME t-girls.  To be completely honest, a change in orientation is often a large part of my own fantasies.  

I don't mean to offend, but can I ask if you felt that you were purely heterosexual before and that your orientation really changed or do you think that you might have been repressing that side of yourself before and that transition was the push needed to free it?  Or, do you feel that these feelings developed afterwards?  Or am I completely off and misunderstanding what you wrote?  I ask, because reading this comment from "clones don't have 400k" in this yahoo answers made a lot of sense to me:


I think the reason I find this whole thing so interesting is my own orienation is so unusual.  I currently ID as asexual, and as a man I have no doubt that is my true orientation.  I have zero interest/desire to have sex with anyone.  The idea of any type of intercourse, as I am, is actually slightly nauseating to me.

But, I am not so sure if that would be true if I were a woman/ were to transition.  I have read in many places that transitioning has caused asexuals to develop a sexuality and I wonder if that would be true for me or not, of if I would even want that.  I admit that currently I do feel attractions only to women, but I can't help but feel that attraction is purely aesthetic and  probably more due to my crossdreaming nature.

Even romantically, I don't know.  I have only had one crush in my life (and I am not sure if it really was a crush TBH), and it was to a person on the internet I never met.  Further, at the time she was pretending to be a woman but later it turned out she was actually a (gay) guy.  Honestly, I didn't even care at the time.  
Does that make me gyneromantic as I thought he was a girl originally?  Homoromantic in that he turned out to be a guy?  Biromantic?  Panromantic as I didn't even care afterwards?  Or was it even romantic feelings as I never even met the person in real life?  

Sometimes I wonder, if on some level I knew he was a guy, and if that gender ambiguity was what caused me to care so much for him/her.  Is that even possible?  To only feel romantic feelings for people who can't be described as either male or female, or to whom they posses qualities of both?

But, enough about me (god I am so self-absorbed), I really did like this post and I would personally LOVE to hear about your experiences with transwomen.  

Pretty please Cute

Last Edited By: Lost247365 Jul 6 16 1:33 PM. Edited 1 time.

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#2 [url]

Jul 7 16 1:49 AM

You know all my life I have felt shame that I would be attracted to men, I would talk to then and have feels of really wanting to jump on them and snog there face off or have feelings of wanting a cuddle or see a topless man and feel aroused as well as all thoughts and dreams. But as I did not know that I was trans I would feel anxious and shame as I knew that I was not gay WTF I'm hetro. Now that I know that I am trans and that it is totally part of who I am, that shame has gone and I accept myself as is. I can now have fun at the gym or on the beach, but would I ever sleep or have a relationship with one I don't know because even though i am more open when ever these feelings come out I see a big pain of glass in front of me as though I can see but not touch.

I just wonder if HRT is the hammer that will break that glass and turn me from loving my masculine wife into loving a man.

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#3 [url]

Jul 9 16 10:51 AM

There are too many stories like the one of Proser30 for this to be some kind of exception to the rule. Many trans women, who have started out as gynephilic (being attracted to women) end up in bed with men. Some of them tell me they did so only because it was some kind of affirmation of their womanhood, but great many also end up describing themselves as bisexual.

That should come as no surprise. More and more research seem to accept that many people are fluid as sexual orientation goes, and there seems to be a general concensus that this at least is the case for women. To me it makes perfect sense that this also applies to transgender women.

Trans woman and researcher Jaimie Veale has even forwarded the fascinating theory that many trans women suppress a natural androphilia (orientation towards men) when growing up, due to a combination of internalized homophobia and transphobia, desperately trying to live up to the the ideals of the hetersosexual man. I am not sure if she is right about this, but I am sure it makes sense for some.

I guess the main lesson must be that there is so much variation here that we should be open to anything. Moreover, we learn from experience, so what you are telling us, Poser30, makes perfect sense to me.

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#4 [url]

Jul 9 16 11:23 AM


I would love to hear more about your experience with men.

I have one question: There may be a difference between being attracted to women or men and being attracted to femininity and masculinity. Many FTM girlfags, for instance, say they are attracted to men, but to feminine men or gay men. Have you also become more open to the masculinity of men?


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#5 [url]

Jul 9 16 8:37 PM

Proper30, thank you for share of your story, i guess i will be completely in one line with your sentences
"Am I still attracted to women and open to dating women ? YES.
Would I date a man in the future ? YES I would date a man if he wants more than just one time sex."

I'm not transitioned transwoman and still feel desire toward woman, but since i broke jail of shame i more and more feel desire toward man, and like you, i can find here two components. First it is desire to be feminine in male/female dynamics and second - attraction to man, their body parts e.t.c. And i'm already have expirience of romantic and sexual desire toward real man.

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#6 [url]

Jul 10 16 5:20 PM

When I've been with a few transgender women, it seemed like I got the best of both worlds in a way. I could be with a feminine person but it was an exciting feeling that they transformed from a male to a female, something I've been doing and wanted to do for a long time. Physically it felt like I was with a woman but did get to enjoy some play with male parts both ways. In some ways it was difficult since both of us still had male parts and were wishing at least one of us had a vagina or maybe we both wish we had a vagina in the encounter. It was nice to feel her soft feminine figure and skin.

With getting with men in a way it was validating the ultimate crossdreamer fantasy, the man was making you feel soo feminine and a lady in the encounter that was a big part of the arousal. But by getting to know him you also started to like things about the way he looks or acts and feels. But here also the tough part was wishing I had a vagina in the interaction.

One thing that I read in a hated book in the transgender community 'The Man who would be Queen" by Micahel Bailey is he claims that men can adjust themselves to have sex with each other like they do in prison but that's not bisexuality but just convinience. For a time I thought this may have been the case, but I now feel like I disagree with him on this and even in that case it is bisexuality that we all have in us at least a little bit.

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